The 30 days of Blogging...falalalala lalalala

I'm sure someone has already done this, but I've decided to write a post every day for the next 30 days. Why? Well, the short answer is to help heal my throat chakra. The long answer would entail my telling you why I would need or want to heal my throat chakra. Since the subject will probably come up at least once in the next thirty days, I'll just leave it at that. ;)

'Til tomorrow :D

If you don't love yourself...

I know that most of us have heard or said: "How do you expect someone to love you if you don't love yourself?" I admit that I really hated that saying. I always assumed that it meant that I wasn't love-worthy...that if I didn't love myself I wasn't worthy of being loved. Well, I was wrong.

After 30+ years of life I finally understood what it really meant: If you don't love yourself, you won't be able to see all of the people around you who do love you. I don't care who you are, there are people around you who love you, who care for you and who support you. By not loving yourself, by not believing in yourself and how special you are, it becomes harder to see those feelings coming from other people.

So, remember that everyone deserves love...everyone deserves love. It's up to us to lift that veil of self-doubt to see it.

Pushers and Leechers

A friend of mine found it quite simple to categorize men. She would say that they are either fun or boring. The fun ones are less than responsible; the boring ones are very responsible, but don't ask them to be fun. I thought it was funny, but I don't usually subscribe to such a generalization. However, I am going to contradict myself with the following post.

Today, I want to talk about two types of people I have frequently come across in my life: the pushers and the leechers. I don't really have any leechers left in my life (let me check...nope, I think I got rid of all of them). But, there are many pushers still left in my close circle of family and friends.

If you're wondering what I mean by these names, let me explain. A leecher is a person (friend or not) who just sucks the life right out of you. The darkness and self pity they live in is so strong that it just takes all the happy energy from everyone around them. In my early 20s I had a friend like that. Even when I think of her now, all I see is this type of gray veil surrounding her. Now, I don't mean to say that she is a bad person. She is not. But, she was a toxic person...at least for my type of personality.

The pusher is a person (friend or not) that pushes their way into your life. They are bossy, strong-willed and try to get you to do what they want, see life through their eyes and basically live your life the way they think is right. Balls to those people! They really irritate me. I have a friend who is that way. She's a great person (I can attest to that), but her behavior is very invasive. That also means that she is a toxic person...again, at least for my type of personality.

Now, what I have learned is that you have to hold onto your "self" when your dealing with a leechers. Their "vacuum cleaner" personality is already turned on. You just have to hold on to something and wait for them to leave. In my case, I've never really had a problem with this type of personality. I just stuck around for a while, listened to them, and went on my way.

My problem has always been the pusher. With pushers, you HAVE to have strong, almost immovable boundaries. It's like you're the goalie, and they are going to try to score anyway they can...even if it's with a cheap shot (hope you're all following my metaphor). Boundaries are one of my weak spots. I never know if setting limits is a good thing or if I'm just being mean and unreasonable. (Seriously, I am working on it!) Unfortunately, I have this nagging certainty that once I truly learn to set boundaries, these types of people will just vanish from my life (or in the worst of cases, I will learn how to deal with them in a healthy way).

How about you guys? Have you met a leecher or pusher you just can't shake? Any other type of people who frequently show up in life (good or bad)? I'd really like to know, so feel free to comment. :)

Re-vamping

After much thought, I have decided to change the direction of my blog. As you can see in the blog description (in the header), I no longer subscribe to "a blog about crafts & life". Don't get me wrong, I still love crafts. I do consider myself to be, for the most part, a craftsman. I like making things with my hands, I love cooking, baking, etc. But, I realized that that's not what this blog was "supposed" to be about.

Without knowing it (or rather, failing to admit it to myself), the main purpose of this blog was to talk about myself and how I've managed to build my life even if (especially because) it's not quite how I imagined it would be when I was kid.

Lately, I've been reminded about something my high school director said to me. I used to compete in extemporaneous speech, and I wasn't great at it. But, I did manage to do some damage especially when I got a topic that I was passionate about. Once he told me that he knew exactly what rounds I would do well in when he got a chance to look at the topics. "The environment? Oh, yeah, Pini's going to knock this one out of the park." And (as much as I hated to admit it) he was right.

The greatest lesson I think that I learned from that is that life is easy, pleasurable and satisfying when you follow your heart. Well, lately I haven't been following my heart, and that has been a bummer. So, that's one of the reasons (maybe the only one or at least the most important one) that motivated my changing the course of this blog.

I hope that those of you following me and those of you who stumble upon this blog are not taken aback by this change. Trust me when I say: it was a change that needed to be made :) and I'm quite certain that it will actually make me want to blog more frequently. So, until next time!

Crafty Idea of the Week - Halloween Edition

Hey, y'all! I've finally found a moment to sit down and update the old blog. I hope that today's crafty idea will be worth the wait. Since Halloween is close at hand, and everyone is probably running around looking for their costumes (or rather waiting 'til the last minute to throw one together), I got to thinking about the poor, neglected trick or treat bag.

Remember the plastic jack o lanterns we used to go trick or treating? or the plastic bags we would get at school? They were cool and got the job done. But, they were always missing the cute factor...until now. I recently came across these candy corn trick or treat bags and thought I would share.

CANDY CORN TRICK OR TREAT BAG (from purlbee.com)

Here's the link if you want to check out the patterns and instructions. It looks pretty easy, and I bet you could even change the color the stripe to match your outfit!
Happy Halloween everyone...have fun and be safe.

Payasito, por favor no te subas a la micro!

Nos ha pasado a todos. Estamos en el paradero mirando la gente y las micros pasar. De pronto y de reojo, lo vemos...nuestro enemigo numero uno: el payaso (ta-ta-ta-tan). Cuando un payaso anda rondando el paradero, siempre existe la posibilidad que se suba a nuestra micro. ¿Cuántos hemos esperado para ver a que micro se sube primero? ¿Cuántos hemos pensado "Ay, no! Que lata!" cuando estamos sentados y vemos que se sube?

Yo soy la primero en reconocer que yo hago ambas cosas...siempre. No tengo nada contra los payasos y mucho menos tengo coulrofobia. Entiendo que desempañan una labor para llevar comida a sus mesas, pero ¿porque me tiene que hacer participe de su acto?

No necesito (ni quiero) que hagan sonar un celular chanta para que lo contesten y me digan que es para mi. No necesito que me digan que soy la hermana de Harry Potter. No necesito que me digan: ¿Porque tan poco riseños chiquillos, si solo es un poco de humor?

Srs. Payasos si quieren que nos lo pasemos bien en las micros yo veo una de dos opciones: cambian la rutina (porque TODOS repiten los mismos chistes) o no me involucren en su acto (porque si no tendré que empezar a cobrar como actríz de reparto, JA!)

Back again!

Wow, I've been on a really extended hiatus, haven't I? Well, sometimes there just isn't too much time to sit down and blog :(. I'll let you know about what's been going on later this week.

I'm making some changes in the weekly structure of Black Hole Knitter. I hope to post at least one bilingual/Spanish post per week, and I'm thinking of changing Pattern of the Week Friday to "Crafty Find of the Week" (i.e., there are probably going to be lots of Etsy links, hehehe).

Anyways, here's hoping that I can keep up the momentum! :)

Motivational Monday

I was recently reminded of this motto:

"Hope floats"

...so keep the faith, y'all

Happy Monday!

Benzodiazepine Withdrawal is a...Son of a Mother Duck!!

First of all, for those of you who are offended by the title of this post, you have obviously never had to go through withdrawal. If you had, you would know that there is no other way to put it.

Second, I had been on my anti anxiety meds for a few months before my shrink decided it was time to start the weaning process. All in all, I took those meds for 10 months and two weeks.

Third, I strongly suggest that you ONLY take anti anxiety meds under the supervision of a doctor.

Last month, I had told you guys that I was officially off of my anti anxiety meds (see old post). I was so happy because I hadn't had any withdrawal symptoms. But, I spoke way too soon.

On November 3, I had an "almost" panic attack before falling asleep. Man, did it scare the everliving crap out of me! I had to take a quarter of a pill just to settle down. The very next day I scheduled an appointment with my therapist. Obviously, I still had to work through some anxiety issues.

I have been able to work on those issues, but I really just want to share my experience with withdrawal symptoms in this post.

Those of you who know me know that I would never willingly have a problem with drugs or alcohol. For that reason, I never thought that I would ever have to face something as difficult as withdrawal. It is a very scary experience. My symptoms included uncontrollable (yet sporadic) twitching in my legs and feet, shaky hands, anxiety and restlessness.

The worst part is that I felt like someone else, but in my skin. I wanted to get up and run around or talk a thousand miles an hour. I wanted to keep my hands from shaking. I wanted not to get stressed out, and I wanted to take the pills to make it all go away. I could do none of the first three things, and I CHOSE not to do the last.

Let me just tell ya', that last choice was the hardest of all. The only thing that kept me from taking a pill was the thought of having to go through withdrawal again. It is not a fun process, and I'm glad a friend gave me a head's up before I started experiencing any symptoms.

Since Nov 3, I haven't taken any pills (though I have wanted to a couple of times). The shaking and restlessness stopped after about two weeks (thank goodness!) The twitching slowly subsided, and I have been able to manage my anxiety in a much more productive way.

For those of you who are taking benzodiazepine medication be aware of the withdrawal symptoms and consult with your doctor. For those of you going through withdrawal, a few weeks of symptoms is nothing compared to a lifetime of not having to take them. For those of you who are neither, I hope you never have to fall into the previous categories.

Take care and talk to ya soon!

Pattern of the Week

When I saw the following pattern, I just had to share it with you guys. I get daily newsletters from Knitting Daily (Beading and Quilting Daily, too). For the most part, the newsletters contain info about techniques, where to shop and some rather traditional patterns.

But, I thought this one was really impressive. For me, the coolest part is that the designer (Norah Gaughan) has a double degree in biology AND art. Too cool!

POTW: Knitted Tree Topper, by Norah Gaughan
Photo from www.knittingdaily.com

This pattern uses double pointed needles (DPNs) and is stuffed to keep the star pointy.

This project can be made with different colored yarns to get different effects. The more advanced crocheters will also be able to deduce the pattern from this photo.

You can download the pattern here...and see some other versions and a video here.

Hope you liked it...Merry Christmas!

Pattern of the Week (x2)

I know, I know, I know. I just can't seem to get myself organized to post every week. I haven't given up, though.

Here are a couple more patterns that I've found. The first is from knitty.com (my goto place for knitting patterns). The second pattern is from a crafty blog, Pretty Ditty. Check them both out for good patterns and ideas.

POTW1: (Not-all-the-way) Fingerless Gloves, Cigar by Kerri Cadd. Photo by LuAnn Cadd
I LOVE these gloves. They would have come in really handy when I was a student. I don't really think they are just for men, though. Actually, I think that any artist, painter, draftsmen would be thrilled to own a pair.

I plan on making myself a pair for the winter. I just need to find the perfect yarn. :)

POTW 2: Halloween Delight - Pretty Ditty Apron, by Pretty Ditty. Photo from pretty-ditty.blogspot.com

A friend of mine posted an apron that she made a few months ago. It was really nice. I loved it. So, when I came across this apron, it reminded me of her. :)

If you go to Pretty Ditty's blog, you will see a whole bunch of homemade products. She sells her patterns and products at her Etsy shop. If you want some good ideas, surf on down to her blog.

Well, that's it for this week. Hope you like these patterns.

Pattern of the Week (x2)

Okay, so I have been a little tied up in the past few weeks. But, I think I'm finally hitting my stride. Since I haven't posted a POTW, I'm going to give you TWO this week :).

Winter is upon us (in the northern hemisphere actually, cuz here it's almost summer, ha!) and I've been checking The Purl Bee and Knitty for some season appropriate ideas. Here are my choices:

POTW 1: Daisy Stitch Handwarmers (picture from purlbee.com)

I found these a couple of years ago. LOVE! They are so adorable and easier to make than you think. There's a great deal of repetition in the pattern. Once you get a rhythm going, it goes very quickly.







POTW 2: Mushroom Hat (picture from purlbee.com)

My sister loved this hat and wants one for winter. So, off to find lovely yarn to make it. :)









So, that's it for this week. I hope you try these patterns. They just take a little patience, but the results are awesome. Good luck and see ya next week.

Motivational Monday

No quote today, just a story that I hope motivates you guys to do anything you put your mind to.

As of last Monday, I am officially off of my anti anxiety meds! I was a bit worried because every time my doc would lower by dosage, I would feel the effects within a couple of days. So far, the only withdrawal symptom I'm experiencing is that it's taking a little longer for me to fall asleep.

Before the meds and therapy, it would take me anywhere between 45 min to an hour to fall asleep. During the night, I would wake up 4 or 5 times. Needless to say, I would usually wake up tired in the morning.

Now, it takes me about 30 minutes to fall asleep and I don't wake up at all during the night at all. A fair trade off if you ask me. :)

I really appreciate the experiences that some of you shared with me. They really have helped me through this experience.

Well, hope you have a great Monday and week!!

Motivational Monday

Not much to say today. I'll just leave you with a quote that always makes me smile. Read it, remember it and use it :) and let me know how it goes.

"Ba-zinga"

-Dr. Sheldon Cooper, The Big Bang Theory

Pattern of the Week...with a twist

Okay, so this week wasn't as horrible as I thought it would be. It has been very looooong, though. So, I'm glad the weekend is here.

Anyways, back to the "pattern" of the week. This week I decided to do something different and post a recipe...just because that's how I roll, ;). Today's recipe is pita bread, pita bread, pita bread!!! I LOVE pita bread. I'm a big fan of crusts so this is the best kind of bread for me :)

ROTW: Pita Bread (picture from about.com)

I found this recipe online and it is fabulous. The author, Dedemed, is very thorough with her explanation. You will get about 15, 6-7" pitas with this recipe.

I've made these pitas twice, once with 100% whole wheat flour and once with 100% all-purpose flour. The whole wheat version didn't puff up very much, but the all-purpose version was just beautiful and yummy with a warm, yeasty smell.

If you want to use whole wheat, I strongly suggest you mix it with all-purpose flour if you want the bread to puff up (I would say 1/2-1/2, but I haven't tried it yet so you might want to stick with a 1/3 to 2/3 ratio).

Here are some other pointers so that you can get the best pita bread possible:

• Yes, the oven has to be THAT hot (500°)
• You have to use plenty of flour to roll out the bread, because the dough gets very sticky.
  
• Don't leave them in the oven too long. I don't let them brown, because they tend to get brittle if they bake too long.
  
• Store them in a plastic bag to keep them moist. Make sure they are cold before you stick them in the bag...you don't want wet pitas.
  
• Fry them up. This recipe makes yummy pita chips.

That's it, guys. I must say it again: this recipe makes great pita bread. Don't be afraid of the yeast, just let it bubble up and it's good to go. Happy cooking!

p.s. If you have a problem with the link, let me know, and I'll see what I can do.

Progress Report: Pattern of the Week

Hey guys! Like I promised here are some pictures of my Dolman-sleeve bolero. I haven't had much time to work on it, so it's coming along quite slowly :(. But, I'm going to make the effort to speed things along because it's getting quite hot, and I'd really like to use it for summer :)

Enjoy!

My progress so far. Slow but steady!

The long stitches I put in every nine rows. Makes knitting SO much faster :)

The two yarns that I'm using to knit. I had them both for the longest time and could never quite find the right project...'til now.

Motivational Monday

Man, this week is going to suck. I just know it. I have a deadline on Friday, and I just despise writing meaningless articles that have about as much truth as a presidential campaign.

Nevertheless, I try to stay focused and up beat about it. After all, I do have a lot of great things in my life that make that sacrifice worth while (for now at least). So here's Monday's quote:

"Perspective is the most important thing to have in life."

-Lauren Graham

Have a good day, Monday-haters...this week I am one of you ;)

This week has flown right by. I so do appreciate short work weeks, but I almost forgot it was Friday! Anyways, here's my pattern for the week. It's a dolman sleeve bolero. I love boleros, and I've been wanting to make something with a dolman sleeve ever since I found out what a dolmen sleeve was...ha! Without further ado here's the:

POTW: Dolman Sleeve Bolero

I pick two different yarns, 100% cotton. One is a gorgeous teal color and the other is variegated with light calypso and tan. I love the combination.

The pattern and instructions can be found here. I'm adjusting the pattern to my size so there's a lot of frogging and re-knitting going on. Aaand, I also tweeked the pattern a little by adding a long stitch every nine rows. Alas, that is the life of a knitter. I'm about halfway done with the first sleeve. I'll be sure to post a photo of my progress next week.

If you're a beginner, this is a great project to try. The website is in Spanish, but just follow the pattern mold and use the stitch you are most comfortable with. Have fun!

Motivational Monday

"No horse gets anywhere until he is harnessed. No stream or gas drives anything until it is confined. No Niagara is ever turned into light and power until it is tunneled. No life ever grows great until it is focused, dedicated, disciplined."

-Harry Emerson Fosdick

Pattern of the Week

This pattern isn't a new find. It's actually an old one. I subscribe to knitty.com, and they have some fabulous patterns for knitters. If you're a beginner or a seasoned pro, check it out.

POTW: Nob Hill Shrug

As most knitters, I started knitting scarves. That got boring really fast, so I started looking for more challenging patterns. Soon, I was making boleros and shrugs...the next logical progression, in my experience.

This pattern is slightly more challenging than a regular bolero or shrug just because of the shaping required. Even so, it is a very fast project to knit.

I made my own version of this shrug last year. It is very comfortable and stylish. :)